Please God, let me live to be 152. I don’t make this plea because I’m afraid to die, but because that’s when Lamborghini will give me the best birthday present of all – its Gallardo. Forget about sweet 16, with its raging hormones and chronic cases of acne. Automobili Lamborghini SpA proved that 152 is the sweetest age of all by donating a Gallardo to the Italian State Police for its 152nd anniversary. I guess I better put down my cigarette and eat some vegetables because I have a long way to go before they turn over those keys.
By the time I’m 152, I’ll probably have as many conditions and illnesses as I’ve had birthday cakes. But luckily for me, I can get my Gallardo equipped with lots of neat gadgets to save my life, like the ones in the new Italian police car. Automobili Lamborghini SpA donated the Gallardo complete with high-tech equipment for emergencies and first aid, including a defibrillator, which will come in handy considering I’ll probably have a heart attack when I see the Gallardo, with its 500-hp V10 engine, roll into the parking lot of my retirement home. If a volunteer should find me clutching my left arm, the Gallardo’s 190-mph-capability, all-wheel drive and sophisticated system for sending and receiving messages about traffic accidents, fires and disaster situations should help me make it to the hospital in record time.
Let’s suspend reality for a second and pretend that I actually make it to 152 and that the DMV hasn’t revoked my driver’s license (which should happen once a person thinks 4:30 is an appropriate dinnertime). Will I even remember where the accelerator is? And, more importantly, will I still want to use it – or will I be cruising in the fast lane on the highway at 37 mph?
Lamborghini, do the poor sap stuck behind me on the freeway a favor. Give me the keys now.
Writer Liz Blickle is an intern with BodyShop Business, although she’s considering quitting to join the Italian State Police.
