With the birth of the Hummer H2 (the younger brother of the military-inspired Hummer H1), the ultimate off-road machine just became more civilian- and freeway-friendly. Though not as big its big brother, the H2 isn’t small by any means, nor is it
completely civilized. I predict this new addition could lead to a messy sibling rivalry.
- It’s more of a MAC Truck than a MINI.
Although the Chevrolet Tahoe-based body of the H2 is slightly smaller than the original, at 6,400 pounds, more than 69 inches wide, 77 inches tall and almost 190 inches long, you still won’t be able to park it in those compact car spaces.
- Does this tank run on diesel?
No. Unlike the 6.5-liter, 195-horsepower diesel engine of the H1, the H2 is powered by a 6.0-liter, 316-horsepower V-8 engine.
- And the barracks are better.
The military background of the original Hummer meant that its interior was as bare as Britney Spears in concert. This new version, however, has many of the standard creature comforts that the H1 was lacking. The H2 comes with dual-zone front temperature controls, cup holders and a Bose sound system. Heated leather seats and the biggest sunroof that GM offers are also available.
- What if I want to take it off the beaten path?
No problem. Although the H2 is more cosmopolitan than the H1, it’s no Rolls-Royce. It’s capable of fording water up to 20 inches deep and climbing steps up to 16 inches tall.
- When I cruise around – wearing Khakis and pretending that I’m a soldier home on leave – I want the “guys” with me. Will they fit?
Sure. To allow for its enormous ground clearance, the transmission of the original Hummer was located in the passenger compartment. But because the transmission of the H2 is below the car, you can fit something other than a machine gun in the passenger seat. And if you’ve got more than three friends, there’s always optional third-row seating. Unfortunately, because of the 98-pound spare tire stored in the cargo bay, there’s only room for one person in the third row.
- Does the H2 still have the ground clearance of an NBA center?
Not exactly. Because the transmission was moved below the car to make more room in the passenger compartment, the 9.9-inch ground clearance isn’t quite as impressive as the original 16 inches.
- Over the hills and through the woods – no problem, but will I make it to Grandma’s house?
With an estimated gas mileage as low as 11 miles per gallon in the city, you may want to make sure you fill the 32-gallon tank (and your wallet) before going on any road trips.
- Real men don’t ask for directions.
Be serious. You can’t ask for directions because you’re lost in the middle of the woods. But don’t worry, you can use the standard OnStar system to get directions without leaving your seat. And in case you get lost at night, the truck version of the H2 that’s being developed will include a roof-mounted, 360-degree night-vision unit so you can watch things that go bump in the night using an infrared camera located in the passenger compartment.
- I don’t have a military budget. Can I still afford an H2?
Although the H2 is available at half the cost of the original, the $48,000 price tag has many consumers holding out for an H3.
Writer Ben Blickle is an intern with BodyShop Business.